The Loch Ness Monster mourns Steve Irwin

She never met him but it was always on the cards and here at Nessie on the Net we have been working towards it. But it was not to be and today the world lost a leading light as Steve was cruelly taken from us by a freak accident:

Nessie is devastated and could not be contacted for comment. She is said to be sick and tired of the boring mediocrity that came to look for her in the 60s and 70s and the old bearded non-entities that still hang around her haunts like a bad smell. She was hoping for so much more but, sadly, young talent has been cut away by cruel fate.