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Professor Kettle reports serious problems with cryptozoology. “Many colleagues were due to arrive here from overseas to help with our research project and all of that is on hold. We are also very worried that the ash falling from the skies is highly acidic and may harm the aquatic life including Nessie”.
“People from the Shetland Isles are already reporting volcanic ash from the eruption in their mouths and lungs and a sulphur smell in the air so we are expecting trouble soon”, he added.
Dr Pott is concerned that the long dormant super volcano beneath Loch Ness could now erupt. “We are monitoring the seismographs very closely because if this volcano erupts it will blow apart half of the Highlands and could create a twenty year winter across the northern hemisphere triggering a new Ice Age”.