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Is a new strain of Malaria about to monster Loch Ness?

Scientists at the UK Health Security Agency (UKHSA) are now probing the Thames estuary for mosquitoes and their larvae in a desperate attempt to thwart the spread of a mutant super-strain of the mosquito borne disease.

Speaking to us from his Loch Ness Research Project, Professor Kettle said, “The real worry for us in the Highlands of Scotland and Loch Ness is that climate change has warmed us up and may bring the pox with it. We have very large mosquitoes and if they cross-breed with our midges, it could be armageddon”.

The Highlands of Scotland Tourist Board was unavailable for comment but has issued a watching brief to the professor. “Malaria was endemic in England until the end of the 1800s and we are also on notice from the world health organisations to be on the look out for deadly West Nile Virus.”

Everyone must take precautions and be constantly aware of the hazards all around us. It is not thought that Nessie is at risk from either virus.

First Nessie Sighting of the Year – caught via our LiveCam AGAIN!

The World has gone mad for it as veteran Loch Ness Monster spotter claims to have captured this year’s first registered webcam sighting of the fabled beast.

*Nessie spotted on our Loch Ness Livecam*

Hospital clerk Eoin O’Faodhagain (56), from County Donegal in Ireland, captured footage of what he believes was Nessie at 3.26 pm on March 23.

This marks the first great sighting of our resident cryptozoological Loch Ness Monster, Nessie, via our Nessie on The Net Loch Ness LiveCams.

You can read the full story in the Inverness Courier and it’s going global.

Keep believing and and keep hunting for Nessie!

We Salute The Decades Of Service By Brutalist Public Conveniences That Graced Loch Ness

These were happier times before global catastrophes and woe filled the news everyday. Drumnadrochit was a siple little village with simple pleasures like hunting for Nessie, a pastime enjoyed by many locals and visitors alike.

Of course lengthy monster hunting meant that a state-of-the-art public convenience (WC or toilet) was required and so an award winning brutalist masterpiece was created that rivalled the old supermarket. You can see the attention to detail and the careful maintenance that kept this cherished building flush with success for so long.

Award winning Brutalist loos serviced the area for years.

Sometimes queues of people formed between the loo and the bus stop as people were eager to try out its comfy environs. But alas, eventually it’s time passed and the thunder box was demolished with a small ceremony but lives on in village folklore. It was a Loch Ness Monster, worthy of the name.

Inverness in Covid19 – Like A Zombie Apocalypse

Walking into central Inverness in the Scottish Highlands near Loch Ness during what should be a busy lunchtime on a weekday. Coronavirus has turned the Capital of The Highlands of Scotland into a scene resembling a dystopian post apocalyptic nightmare.

Here is a video of the devastation:

Inverness Ghost Town As Coronavirus COVID19 Rages

In scenes from an apocalyptic movie, Scotland’s Capital of the Highlands, Inverness, is now a ghost city. Hardly any people are to be seen. Shops are boarded up and if a man was pulling a cart up the High Street yelling “bring out your dead” was working, it would be like the Great Plague of the 17th century.

Restaurants, takeaways, pubs, theatres, social venues, public gardens – just about everything is closed and tourists, visitors and locals are being told to stay away and stay at home.

“It’s a disaster for the Loch Ness Research Project for Internet Anomalies“, Professor Kettle told this paper. “We are doing what we can from self-isolation on our carbon fibre floating hub on Loch Ness but we have been told we must stay anchored well away from the land and have supplies sent to us by boat with social distancing maintained at all times. Obviously, if Nessie became infected then this pandemic could become much worse as the interaction of a novel virus with a Jurassic creature could cause unknown mutations”.

COVID-19 Fears for Loch Ness Monster

Locals are beginning to fear that novel coronavirus (COVID19) may have infected Nessie and possibly killed the creature(s). No credible sightings of the monster have been made since the lock-down of Scotland began a month ago.

“We know that the Loch Ness Monster is a prehistoric creature and therefore shares DNA with modern birds and animals. In fact, birds are descendants of the dinosaurs and that is why recent outbreaks of Avian Flu have also placed the cryptid at risk”, Professor Kettle – leader of the Loch Ness Investigative Research Project said.

The government has passed laws preventing tourists from visiting the Highlands of Scotland until further notice and all non-essential businesses are closed. All we can do is hope that Nessie is safe and will be seen again soon.

Now, more than ever, keep your eyes peeled for her on our Award Winning Loch Ness LiveCams.

Loch Ness Coronavirus Covid-19 Horror

Inverness by Loch Ness starts Coronavirus Testing in Emergency Army Style Horror

Locals and visitors to the areas have been very concerned as “Drive-Thru” Bio-Hazard tents have been erected to test people for the deadly coronavirus COVID-19. Medical staff at Raigmore hospital attend the plague containment units wearing special suits and breathing apparatus.

A spokesperson for the silent majority said, “we have the Loch Ness Monster – protected in law by the government – so we cannot risk the virus doing more damage. Already people have been panic buying in supermarkets and no hand sanitizer is available, with pasta and toilet paper among other items now is short supply”.

Anyone arriving in The Highlands could be dealt with by ever stricter quarantine policies and Invergordon has already announced a potential sinking of cruise ferry arrivals. Empty hotels and restaurants are reeling.

Inverness Street Peddler faces trial for multiple alleged rapes including child victims.

Kim Gordon (aka Kim Avis aka Kem) is accused of raping three women and attempting to rape one of them when she was 12.

The 55-year-old is also accused of sexually assaulting a girl when she was 11 and faces breach of the peace and threatening and abusive behaviour charges.

The allegations cover a period between January 1997 and March this year and mainly relate to alleged incidents in the Inverness area.

The trial will commence in Edinburgh High Court on 20 March 2020.

Mega Hotel Blot To Destroy City Centre Parking

Locals love Rose Street car park. It has a beautiful entrance slope up to an elevated parking platform with sweeping views of Homebargains, Iceland and the toy superstore plus of course the unique and award winning Hanging Gardens of Inverness. The lower level provides shelter for winos and druggies with quick easy access to the bus station and local pubs.

Now all this will be destroyed by a new tower block hotel. The residents of the hotel will have the views to themselves and normal folk will just have to find a space miles from the High Street or squeeze into the multi-storey, which is already full at peak periods.

We salute Highland Council and its inspired planning department for wrecking another part of the so-called city.

Hopes fade about new Inverness & Highlands Caledonian Sleeper Service

The new train’s rolling stock has been beset by problems with reports of brake fails, dodgy plumbing and cold or hot rooms with poor showers and uncomfortable beds. Tickets cost up to £400 (approx $450) for a London – Inverness return ticket (you can fly for as little as £15 each way!!!)

All-in-all I think it sounds dreadful. We’ll see what mess happens next.