These were happier times before global catastrophes and woe filled the news everyday. Drumnadrochit was a siple little village with simple pleasures like hunting for Nessie, a pastime enjoyed by many locals and visitors alike.
Of course lengthy monster hunting meant that a state-of-the-art public convenience (WC or toilet) was required and so an award winning brutalist masterpiece was created that rivalled the old supermarket. You can see the attention to detail and the careful maintenance that kept this cherished building flush with success for so long.
Sometimes queues of people formed between the loo and the bus stop as people were eager to try out its comfy environs. But alas, eventually it’s time passed and the thunder box was demolished with a small ceremony but lives on in village folklore. It was a Loch Ness Monster, worthy of the name.
It’s incredibly cruel: The UK government is seeking to murder Geronimo a lovable alpaca and its owner has fought and sadly lost a £50,000 ($80,000) legal action. You can help by watching the live vigil aimed at deterring officials from arriving with their bolt gun.
News:It is with great sadness that we report that the government murdered Geronimo on 31st August 2021. RIP Geronimo.
The race is on to try and DNA map newly emerged ancient viral strains from bottom coring at Loch Ness.
“I have been worried that vigorous coring and reaming of the loch’s bottom could provide a route for viral agents that have long since disappeared from earth’s biosphere to resurface”, Professor Kettle told this blog. “If we can’t identify and neutralise these things then Covid 19 Coronavirus might look like a walk in the park”.
Some of the mutations discovered have now been taken to the US Centre for Extreme Toxins, close to the site of the Manhattan Project. Here they will be sealed into a glass and concrete bio containment lad 400 metres beneath the desert. Robot analysers will be used to identify and index the viruses. If a leak occurs, these mutations are considered so dangerous that a small nuclear weapon will detonate, completely destroying the laboratory and its contents. Safety is now the number one priority after Covid and Ebola have wreaked so much havoc.
“We’re taking every precaution as some of the life forms beneath Loch Ness have proved very dangerous”.
Similar research is going on in Tibetan glaciers – another link to Loch Ness, which was itself formed by a mile thick glacier during the last ice age.
(Update: The Sun reports this Scottish multiple rapist sex beast was set to rent out AirBnBs to fund his “new life” on the run in the USA).
Once dubbed by some Highland Councillors as “no finer ambassador for Inverness”, street peddler and “musician” Kim Avis aka Kim Gordon aka Kim Vincent or “Kem” has been sentenced to 15 years in prison
Avis raped and molested victims during a decade-long campaign of sex crimes in the Scottish Highlands.
A judge told him at the High Court in Edinburgh: “You then effectively went on the run before US Marshals, unpersuaded that you were dead, tracked you down in Colorado.”
Lord Sandison added: “You were for many years a very well-known street trader in Inverness, busking and selling jewellery from your market stall.”
The judge said that as he understood it, Avis had even received “some sort of good citizen award”.
But Lord Sandison said there was another side to him and the author of a background report prepared on the sex offender had described him as “a controlling and dominant personality”.
He was found guilty of a total of 13 offences of rape, attempted rape, sexual assault and indecency.
He was also found guilty of failing to appear at the High Court in Edinburgh in March, 2019, for proceedings in the case. He was detained in the US in July that year.
Lord Sandison jailed Avis for 12 years for the sex crimes he committed and imprisoned him for a further three years for failing to appear in court.
The judge said of the latter decision: “I regard this as a very serious example of the offence.”
Avis has also been placed indefinitely on the sex offenders’ register.
Police Scotland praised his victims for the “courage, strength and dignity” they had shown throughout the investigation and court case.
Visitors to Loch Ness have been warned not to put Nessie’s life in danger by throwing their old Covid19 face masks into the water.
Unbelievably, every year a large number of tourists dump millions of tonnes of rubbish and human waste all around and into the once pristine waters. Now Loch Ness Research Project Coordinator, Umor Raarbish has gone on the offensive: “We’ve put hidden surveillance equipment at all main areas frequented by visitors and we can monitor their littering in real time”
“Fines of up to £20,000 can be levied against any tourist who makes a mess and our message is simple: “we want your business but not a bad attitude so take your mess with you”.
Professor Kettle, who runs the scientific investigation into the Loch Ness Monster has previously warned about the dangers of avian flu killing Nessie. Dinosaurs are related to birds and Covid is another flu-like virus that puts the multi million year old plesiosaur in grave danger.
The Highlands of Scotland Tourist Board was unavailable at time of going to press.
A fleet of state-of-the-art micro submarines has been plying the dark waters of Loch Ness in a scientific quest to capture DNA and other fragments from the aquatic plesiosaur.
Speaking exclusively to this Blog, Professor Theo Vindelwagen of the California Institute of Marine Supply Conservation said, “we are using laser RADAR submarines that are controlled by a Mother Ship on the surface of the loch. The early images are incredible – several plesiosaur shapes can be seen in submarine “herds” feeding at the bottom of the deepest areas. That’s new and proves that we have many monsters in this unique body of water”.
“Some of your readers may be familiar with the famous submarine that belongs to the British Antarctic Survey, “Boaty Mc. Boat Face”. Our drone subs are technologically superior and we have 35 units now roaming Loch Ness.”
The survey is expected to take a few more days and we look forward to publishing the results as they are created by the AI code. You can watch progress of expeditions via our Loch Ness live stream.
The United States Sheriff who headed up the initial search and subsequent manhunt for fugitive Kim Vincent aka Kim Gordon aka Kim Avis (and as Kem instead of Kim) said justice has finally been served. A jury in Glasgow High Court found the former Inverness street peddler and Loch Ness charity swimmer guilty of 14 counts of rape against women and young girls. He’ll be sentenced on 11th June.
After he went on the run by faking his own death at a beach in Monterey, USA, sex fiend Vincent was hunted down and captured by US Marshalls. He was extradited back to Scotland for trial. His crimes stand out as some of the most numerous and foul committed in Inverness, Scotlland.
Incredibly, when the caged beast first applied for a street traders licence to peddle nic-nacs on the local High Street, a meeting to grant his trader’s licence in 2008 was held at Highland Council. Inverness councillors described Avis, born in Newmarket, Suffolk, as a “city institution”. One added there was “no finer ambassador for the city”.
The jury in Glasgow High Court has found former Inverness Street Peddler, Kim Vincent (aka Avis aka Gordon) also known as Kem, guilty of 14 rapes and sexual assaults against women and also girls aged 11 and 12. He was also found guilty of absconding from justice when he fled from Scotland to the USA in an attempt to fake his own death. US Marshalls hunted him down and extradited him back to face justice in Scotland.
VICTIMS of death faker sex monster speak of their relief after he was finally caged: “Justice has been done.”
Monterey County (where rapist faked his own death) has a TV piece.
Now he is appearing before the High Court in Glasgow and a jury is considering the evidence.
Kim Avis or Kem Vincent (he appears to have many aliases) is a former street busker and peddler who frequented the Inverness High Street. He is alleged to have raped several women and an attempted rape of a 12 year old girl. He is additionally charged with sexually assaulting an 11 year old girl. He initially fled Scotland as a fugitive to the USA where the US Marshalls hunted him down and returned him to jail (on remand) in Glasgow.
Early evidence from one woman at the trial included her description of how he is alleged to have forced her to watch in a mirror as he raped her. The trial continues.